Mother's Day

I had a conversation with a friend recently who is a perfect example of the winding-road that human connections can take, and who is as head-over-heels in love with the child she calls. “daughter.” as she would be if she had given birth to her. She just celebrated that child’s first birthday, a child who came into her life as suddenly and unexpectedly as a snowstorm in a desert.

 Out of curiosity, I asked her, “How has your life changed since she burst onto the stage of your life?” Her big blue eyes locked onto my green ones, her lips pursed as she considered the question. She is hardly ever at a loss for words, or in need of thinking time before answering, but she has been on such a magic-carpet ride since her granddaughter’s birth that she hasn’t had time to take stock, or do anything more than experience the journey, one moment at a time.

 “In every way!” she said, recovering her speech quickly.  “Everything is about her. Everything I do is for her. If she’s awake, I will spend the precious moments with her. If she’s asleep, I’ll get my hair washed and dried.” I noticed that she was wearing a baseball cap.

She went on, “I’m always aware that I only have ‘this moment’ for sure.” From the moment she first learned of her surprise grandchild’s imminent arrival, she has lived with uncertainty. It is a hard gift, but a gift, nonetheless. Unwrapped and accepted, it means that she lives with focused love and attention directed towards this child, fully present with her. But that her heart is so open means it is also open to the potential of sudden heartbreak—that’s the risk that comes with every bond of love.

 My friend remembers a particular day when she played with her dolls and wished her mother would stop working and play with her, but her mother chose to do the dusting instead—task over the relationship. That memory shapes how she loves now—prioritizing the relationship. She pointed out the truth that we can always get more money, but never more time, and grandmothers know how fast a childhood passes. 

So let's cherish the moments. Put people first, especially the little ones. Show grace to those who’ve failed us, and use their failures and our own to be better and do better. Show kindness to ourselves; for we are all imperfect beings. On this day we can easily feel inadequate--but let's just feel human.



Happy Mother’s Day!

Comments

arils and castles said…
What a beautiful reminder to live grace and kindness - Happy Mother's Day Belinda.
8:49 PM
Belinda said…
Dear Nicole, my friend, Happy Mother's Day to you, too!! And thank you.
9:19 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Voyage

Image
Note from Belinda: I read this prayer yesterday and again today--and then I read it to Susan after cell group, when we were having our "second cup" of decaff coffee together. I knew that she'd love it. She has a framed picture on her office wall of a little blond haired girl in a sail boat on a stormy sea. A fatherly sailor,with a weather beaten face; in a gray sou'wester, holds her close, as he capably mans the tiller. This prayer reminds me of that picture and influenced what I wrote earlier today, when I used the metaphor of ebbing waves to describe a lack of consistency and my desire to crash over the sandbar into the peaceful pool on the other side.  ( Susan sent me a link to the painting, which was done by American impressionist Robert Reid in 1888.  It hangs in the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art in NYC.) Be bless ed by the beauty of this prayer. OH LORD OF THE OCEANS, My little bark sails on a restless sea, Grant that Jesus may sit at the
Read more

Ere Zij God--Glory to God in the Highest! A Dutch Carol

Image
By Belinda This beautiful Dutch carol was shared today by a friend of Dutch ancestry, on Facebook. I had never heard it before but absolutely loved it. It moved me deeply, especially at the end after the crowd leaves the church and then breaks into spontaneous singing again around a brazier, with the sound of chiming church bells in the background. Listen to it with headphones or a good speaker to get the full effect of the harmonies. And happy first Sunday in Advent!
Read more

Samson Beaver and his Family

Image
I first posted this in 2009, a little show and tell about one of my favourite photographs. Back then it hung on a wall, but now it's in my bathroom where I see it every morning! I'd forgotten the history behind the story, researched when I first posted this and thought that current readers might enjoy it--a story from a time when this land was still being discovered, not so very long ago. This photograph was taken by Mary Schaffer; artist, photographer, writer and naturalist, in 1907. It is of a Stoney Indian named Samson Beaver, with his wife Leah and daughter, Frances Louise. I bought the photo on a postcard, on a trip to British Columbia and it hangs framed, on the wall I face when sitting at my laptop. I love it. Don't you just feel as if you could gather Frances Louise up in your arms and cuddle her? I get a deep sense of peace and happiness when I look at this family, sitting in the grass of a long ago fall. They are dressed in their best, beautiful c
Read more