1 Chronicles 28:9 (New International Version)
9 "...for the LORD searches every heart and understands every motive behind the thoughts..."
Small meannesses; they weigh heavily on a soul. And so I carried them with me like twin lead pellets in my heart over the last couple of days.
The natural world around me distracted me and drew my gaze. I marveled at the brown collars of earth appearing in the snow at the base of tree trunks.
I wondered at the sound of the mighty wind of yesterday, sister to the rain that fell on heads and homes and ground. They blew and washed away the snow from the fields and ditches with icy breath and fingers.
The fields shimmered with puddles that mirrored the sky. There is no time like this, when the land is emerging from the cold white of winter and the earth is greening. There is so much to see, and revel in and wonder at and admire.
But all the time I was waiting.
I needed, I longed for, Confession; and in the busyness of Tuesday and Wednesday, I had no time to simply still my heart in his presence; still my heart and tell him what he already knew.
I needed to own the words that my lips had formed; but even more, the attitude of heart from which they had flowed; the pollution that had invaded my soul.
Sweet cleansing rain that washes away dross. Sweet Spirit wind that blows through heart chambers with his fragrance.
Psalm 51:6 (New International Version)
6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts ;
you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.