Monday, May 26, 2008

Love and Fear

1 Peter 1:17-22
And remember that the heavenly Father to whom you pray has no favorites when he judges. He will judge or reward you according to what you do. So you must live in reverent fear of him during your time as foreigners here on earth. For you know that God paid a ransom to save you from the empty life you inherited from your ancestors. And the ransom he paid was not mere gold or silver. He paid for you with the precious lifeblood of Christ, the sinless, spotless Lamb of God. God chose him for this purpose long before the world began, but now in these final days, he was sent to the earth for all to see. And he did this for you.
Through Christ you have come to trust in God. And because God raised Christ from the dead and gave him great glory, your faith and hope can be placed confidently in God. Now you can have sincere love for each other as brothers and sisters* because you were cleansed from your sins when you accepted the truth of the Good News. So see to it that you really do love each other intensely with all your hearts.


I have just had a truly amazing experience that I simply had to share with you. On Sunday, my Pastor preached a message that has proven to be life altering for me. He spoke about Saul in the book of I Samuel, and how he was chosen by Samuel to be the first King of Israel. However, we go on to learn that he was chosen largely because of his physical size and good looks. God gave Saul a number of jobs to do, and in the beginning, Saul was successful. Over time, however, he rejected God by relying on his own abilities rather than on God’s power and promises. In the end, Saul’s rejection of God resulted in God’s rejection of Saul and Saul’s ultimate failure. God had called Saul to simply be faithful and obedient to God and trust God to fulfill His word, not to try to do it all with his own brains and muscle. Saul trusted his own abilities over God’s. The battle is not ours.

As I drove home, I thought about some of the doubts I had struggled with in terms of my own ability to be a good youth leader. A few years ago, I had stood in church praising God and seeking His will in my life when He spoke to me. He told me to teach His children to fear Him and to love Him. I knew then that my life of service would be in the form of teaching the young people in our church. I was (and am still) profoundly honored. Yet as I prepare for my youth group each week and pray and study the lessons I will teach, I am always bothered by a small voice nagging me, telling me that I am not good enough because I am not a ‘pastor’. True, I never attended Bible College, so each week I would worry and study and try to memorize in the attempt to give my best to God and my youth. But just as Saul had been appointed to a position by God and then tried to do it with his own strengths, so was I. That path will lead to failure. The story of Saul showed me that God will make up for my lacking. He doesn’t need me to be the most learned scholar in the world, nor do I need to be a world class public speaker. I simply need to be faithful and obedient to what God had called me to do. The battle is not mine.

Next step: I prayed, “God, what do you want me to do to prepare? What is the next step?” I felt led to read the Bible. (I had really hoped He wouldn’t ask me to do that. Sometimes, I find the Bible a little overwhelming and confusing.) But where do I start? How do I know if I am understanding it properly without years of Theology? So many questions. Again and again, doubting my ability.
A spiritual hush.
Just be obedient. Have faith in Me.
So, I picked up my bible.
Where do I begin?
I Peter.
I began at the beginning. As I read my mind kept asking me, “Are you sure this is where God wants you to read? Why start at I Peter? Why not start at the beginning?” I kept reading. I read all of Chapter 1, and moved on to the reading of the notes on the bottom of the page. That is when I saw it. My notes for 1:17 began “Reverent Fear” and went on to discuss its meaning. Further on my notes for 1:22 began “Sincere Love” and continued to talk about its meaning. There it was in black and white. All those years ago I was told to teach His children two things, to fear and to love Him. I put my Bible down and wept. I felt like God was giving me a pat on the back telling me I’d finally figured it out. This isn’t my job I am doing, it is His. I am simply meant to be obedient and faithful to Him. If I do those things, God’s Will will be done. The battle is not mine, the job is not mine, the glory is not mine, it is His. Our job is not to figure it out and make it work. If we are faithful and obedient the battle will be won by God’s power and for His glory. Hallelujah!

Praise you Father God for Your faithfulness to us. Thank you that never expect more from us than we are able to provide. Thank you for Your word which is both Holy and trustworthy. You never fail to give help to those who ask for it and your love in unfailing. You do not grow tired of hearing from us and you will never leave of forsake us. Thank You. Thank You. Thank You. Amen.

7 comments:

Susan said...

Wow, Wendy. I found your post this morning to be inspiring, encouraging, challenging and instructive! A number of things you said have specifically confirmed things God has been saying to me these last few days...

What an adventure is this life in God, hey?

Belinda said...

Faith Girl, What simple yet deep truths. As for your being "qualified;" I can think of no one I would rather know is leading my granddaughters as they enter their pre-teen years than you. Your heart and passion for God,is what they need to see in their leader; a humble heart, devoted to God.

Faith Girl said...

Thank you both for your wonderful words. I am so pleased to know that you were encouraged by this too. God is simply so profound and Holy that I have given up questioning and deceided to simply follow like a lost sheep trusting its shepherd.

Anonymous said...

Faith Girl,
I researched a book on discernment with teenagers for TWO YEARS! And at the end of the day (or about halfway through the two years) I realized that what you have just said here is all that God wants us to do with our young charges.

Thanks for once again crystallizing that, and for coming to realization so fast. You see what happens when we listen to God instead of using our own paths????

Cardinella/Alex

Marilyn from OH who can never remember what name she uses when she comments here said...

I find myself visiting this blog more frequently lately, and this is why, posts like this.

Thanks for your transparency on this topic! That creeping feeling of not being quite good enough, qualified enough, smart enough, entertaining enough, thin enough. 'whatever' enough...undermines so much in the ministry and relationships we've been given.

Trust in God, that he knows what He is doing when He places us somewhere. Also, when He takes us out of a ministry. Trust in God.

Belinda said...

Amen and amen!

Joyful Fox said...

Faith Girl,

Thanks for your transparency and sharing vulnerably what God is doing in your life. It touches and blesses.

It is inspiring to me because I have been on a similar path in teaching Sunday School but with different "nagging voices". He used the written encouragement of the class to see how my obedience makes a difference. Yet it is not I, but Him in me. Apart from the vine, I am nothing and my teaching will bear no fruit.

As we are faithful and obedient, He uses us and makes up for all our lack!

Oh the amazing grace of Him and the power of His Holy Spirit working in and through us!