Whatever He Says

December 31st...a day to look back before looking ahead; at where I didn't do as well as hoped, and where I have changed for the better (in my experience, with God's help.)  I opened the small pink patterned note book in which I chronicled this year's challenges and victories, its pages secured by a knot, promising confidences kept. I found on the fly-leaf, a conversation I recorded because it encouraged me, and I share it here because it is perfect for this day above all: It was September, and our granddaughter Tippy was living out her dream--an art student at  Sheridan College . She and her class-mates were instructed to draw a picture that represented themselves. Then, anonymously, the drawings were made into a slideshow for the class to view and analyse.  When Tippy's drawing came up, some of the students commented on the strokes, saying that they indicated that the artist was confident and strong. As Tippy recounted this to our daughter Brenda later, sh...

Happy 2014 everyone!  I am in Florida with family this week; a precious time of focusing on rest and relationship. I am with Brenda, Kevin, Tippy and Tori. Paul is taking care of Molson the dog and Hazel the cat at home in Canada. This morning Brenda asked what goals we had for this year. As I pondered, gave up, and turned the question back to her, she gave me mine--"Write on your blog!" she said. And so I am. I have some catching up to do since I last wrote on December 15.   I had baked 55 pies at that point, since mid November, when I felt a "God nudge" to bake pies to raise money for the global, non-government funded branch of  Christian Horizons ,  the organization I work for.  To those who might read "God nudge," and not understand what that means, I can only say that it's not something that happens to me every day, but I recognize it when it does by an inexplicable inner "knowing" that I am supposed to do something. It usually m...

By Belinda Over the past few days, with the luxury of extra time to think and reflect, I have leafed through my brown, leather bound journal, which contains my personal thoughts from July 2010 to the present. Back in November, in those pages, I wrote that the act of keeping a journal, putting actual pen to paper; rather than tapping away on a keyboard; seemed to me to be  a more  essentially  intimate connection between heart and page. As I read through the relatively slim quantity of entries, a mere 50 pages or so, this year; I am reminded of how true that is. Even though the entries are scattered and messily written, with many crossings out as I sought to express myself accurately; onto those pages I poured my heart; good and bad; my honest wrestling with self. Letting emotions pour onto the page has given me the benefit of seeing that what seems like truth at one moment, often looks quite different a few days later. Writing it all down as I wrestled through d...

Here it is, the 13th day of the new year already--almost half way through the first month. I have many friends that are firm about not making New Year's Resolutions and I respect their point of view that there is nothing magical about January 1st and that most people break their resolutions by January 10th. Myself I do enjoy the days between Christmas and New Years as thinking and praying time, and starting the new year with a set of goals to press towards in the year ahead. This year I am going slower in thinking everything through though. It occurred to me that if I want to make changes, then making them one at a time is saner than trying to start several new habits or projects all at once. I have made a determined, and successful (so far) effort, to get to bed at 10.00 most nights. I have naturally woken up earlier--often getting up by 4.30, and what a blessing that has been! At last I have that unrushed time I struggled to find consistently until now; just to read, pray and lis...

I am still processing some goals for the New Year. I hope to have them sorted out and down on paper by next week--and when I do, I'll be sharing them here. My friend Paivi commented on my New Year's post, saying that, "Only a true lover of words would choose the word "resolutely" to describe someone's (Paul's) indifference for New Year's. Beautiful and subtle use of oxymoron. (With a pinch of irony)!" I had to confess that I was not that clever--but that she was clever to notice my accidental brilliance.:) I think that her use of words was scintillating. It is a season of reflection and pondering. I don't sit down on New Year's Eve with pen and paper and map a course for the next year, but I find value in taking inventory of my life; thinking deeply about what is working and what isn't, and coming up with a strategy for making good changes. This takes time and it's hard to find long chunks of time to just sit and lay it all out...

By Belinda The night is completely hushed; not a breath of wind, and so quiet that it seems the entire world is standing still for a while. Our property, and the fields, hills and woods behind it, are bathed in moonlight and fine snow falls like mist this New Year’s Eve. Some celebrate with fireworks, toasts and parties, but I am happiest, as tonight, quietly reflecting in our country home, with Paul, who resolutely never celebrates New Years Eve, already sleeping soundly nearby. Memories of the year gone by play like a movie in my mind: Emergency surgery in June taught me that absolutely nothing is carved in stone—not even airline tickets that have been bought and paid for, or a conference at which I was scheduled for many helping tasks. Life can change suddenly. The world carried on and instead of a conference, followed by a vacation in England, I experienced a gift I was not expecting: the gift helplessness. Friends and family visited me in hospital, bringing the gift of presence, f...

Proverbs 16:3 (New International Version) 3 Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed " If you keep doing what you've been doing, you'll keep getting what you've been getting." It was Sunday night and as I anticipated seriously starting back to work in the morning, I knew that it was crunch time. It had been a restful week since Christmas--a week in which I began to adopt new patterns. The week had been like a booster rocket to my determination to get enough sleep, embrace the gift of Sabbath and guard a Sacred Hour. But on Monday morning I would hit the ground running, and I knew that unless I was deliberate in shaking up my normal patterns, I would be sunk. I had a sudden flash of inspiration. "If I don't do anything differently, nothing different is going to happen." OK, OK. I never claimed to be a genius. Maybe it was Sunday morning's sermon at church that got me thinking about all of this. It was from Luke 5:36-38 and ...

Morning Prayer at the Start of a New Year Dear Lord, I confess to wasting so much time; to putting other things before you. For I often foolishly miss the obvious fact that this time; this time with you, is where anything of worth in me is nourished. Hebrews 12:1-2 (New International Version) 1...let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles , and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us . 2 Let us fix our eyes on Jesus , ... This brand new day in a brand new year, has been full of good things. By 8.45 I was starting my Sacred Hour, and cherishing it as the food of my spirit. I opened my treasured devotional, a gift from Susan many years ago now, and read daily every year since; Amy Carmichael's Edges of His Ways. I turned to the first pages and read the Editor's Foreword and found this line about Amy, who, at the time she wrote it, was distanced by age and infirmity from Dohnavur, the community in India for widows and children...

Philippians 1:9 (New International Version) 9 And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, This morning I spent some time reflecting--and even praying--about the year gone by and the year ahead. And I discovered that in doing so, it was a lot of my own wishes that crept into the picture and I truly didn't give God a lot of room to speak into my life. I do remember whispering, as I prayed, "There are no sacred cows, God," but I don't think it really got from my head to my heart, because as I picked up my pen, I wrote too easily and with too many assumptions about what is good and right and God's will in my life. I found though, that as I stayed with God, that I began to get a different idea on what it truly means to pray this kind of prayer. I realize that I tend to start each year as if with my toe on the starting line in a race; waiting for the sound of the pistol to send me running toward my many goals. But w...