Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Things Hard Won

By Belinda

We sang, wrestled with beat, rhythm, harmony and key. With every attempt our voices grew stronger, more confident, the sound more harmonious. In the end we fancied a distinct likeness to the 70's pop group ABBA. Well, we had been at practice for an hour and a half by then; perhaps we were delusional--or maybe we just really, really sounded good.

We spilled out of the church into the coolness of night long fallen. Car doors slammed, assaulting the silence, headlights beamed and motors sped us away to our homes.

As I drove, the result of our efforts made me think about things hard won. 

There are battles in my life I have not yet won. They are testimony to my human frailty, weakness, selfishness, self indulgence, and self deception, but I haven't given up; I am still on the journey.

I have some hard won relationships and those I cherish more than words can fully express.We have wrestled with notes that jarred and wrong keys and practiced our friendships with tears of frustration, misunderstanding, jealousies, anger and hurt. We didn't give up though, because we loved one another.

The prize is true friendship; trust; grace; understanding; acceptance of weakness; and love.

Every time one of my friends graces one of my blurted and too blunt sentences with the words, "But I know you," and we both understand that means the words were interpreted somewhere between mouth and ear, and every time a small thing that shouldn't even hurt, matters, we are leaning into the gift of "hard won" friendship.

We are reaping a harvest from fields dug over, sown with seeds of prayer, long, often painful conversations; and watered with tears of hurt and laughter.

A thing hard won is a very big deal.

(First posted in 2010 and still grateful for those hard won things.)

7 comments:

Susan said...

Me too. (Still grateful.)

Anonymous said...

One of the things I look forward to in heaven is being perfect. Not because I'll "be great", but because I'll never think or say another mean or spiteful thing. Jealousy will be a think of the past. I'll never hurt anyone again. I'll never sin! Imagine that, never sin. I'll be more like Him. I'll be able to serve with my whole heart, soul and mind - perfectly. Until then, oh until then, it is a hard fight. Our love has so many colors.

Belinda said...

Me too, Anon. I am looking forward to "then." Fervently!

Dave Hingsburger said...

Things hard won indeed! Lovely.

Belinda said...

Yes, dear friend Dave. Yours is one of my cherished friendship treasures.

Leslie said...

I sent this to my "best friend forever"- friends for almost 40 years to thank her for the hard work in being my friend :) Yes, it is so worth the struggle.

Belinda said...

Dear Leslie, I am honoured that you would share this with your bff. And what a gift you both have in having been steadfast and true.