Whatever He Says

As long as I can remember, I have loved to sing. I must have been only 6 or 7 at  Hagley Primary School in the U.K  when a rotund, grey-haired teacher strolled up and down the rows of earnestly singing students. His head would tilt as he listened for the slightest hint of dissonance among our voices. He taught us to take a deep breath and exhale slowly, carrying sound on our breath. I still remember him, though not his name, across the long span of 63 years! I loved singing hymns during morning assemblies throughout the rest of my school years, and later, as a teenager in a small evangelical church, sang with a gospel band. We were led by an excellent musician and singer who managed to muster the troops into some kind of order. I often wondered, though, why God apparently didn't give me the voice to match my love of singing. People sometimes assured me it had a "nice" or even "beautiful" sound, but I just heard a soft, thin, reedy voice. A few months ago...

There's an ancient psalm in which an Israelite king named David gives praise to God for being  "fearfully and wonderfully made."  How true! Humans are complex and amazing on all kinds of levels. One thing I thank God for is that we can continually learn, develop, and improve as human beings! Proverbs 16:31 says: "  Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained in the way of righteousness. "  We don't come into the world fully equipped with wisdom and all the "Fruits of the Spirit" installed at the start. Fruit by its very nature takes time to grow and sometimes longer than it needs to, due to our own lack of cooperation. This isn't edible fruit I'm writing of, but the qualities that result from spending time with God, soaking in scripture so that it speaks to us and letting his presence transform us so that we reflect his character.  The fruit of the Spirit   is: Love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness and s...

A couple of weeks ago I started writing now and then, about a few of the life lessons I've learned. I'm still an avid student in the classroom of life, so this is not intended to come from a platform of Yoda-like wisdom--just, for what it's worth what I've learned so far.  Life lesson number 4--since this is Valentine's month: Handle important relationships with care. This probably seems obvious, but  there's a reason for that old saying, "You always hurt the one you love." We relax into a relationship and we feel that we can "let it all hang out." Letting it all hang out is a recipe for damage and pain. I grew up in a family that laid a foundation of some strengths that I'm grateful for, but also some counterproductive patterns that I've spent a lifetime trying to un-learn ! A book that helped me with that was  Scream Free Marriage  by Hal Edward Runkel. Runkel writes about 5 ways that we "scream" in relationships a...

I still remember a long ago New Year's Eve. I was working alone in my office after most of the rest of the world had already gone home, and I was just finishing a few things before going out into the last night of the year. I don't remember anymore what it was that I was so annoyed about, only that I was, at something that I was about to respond to by email. Suddenly, as I was about to press "send," I stopped, my finger poised over the mouse. Did I want the first thing someone read in the New Year to be a snitty email from me? Did I really want to leave behind a toxic trail from one year into the next? Whatever I was so miffed about, suddenly didn't matter so much. I remembered something I'd heard somewhere--something about leaving behind a wake--or maybe it was about leaving fingerprints on people's lives! Anyway, I realized that just on the off chance that I might never be seen or heard from again I didn't want the last thing I did, to be unkind,...

Time for another of the Life Lessons on my list. This probably doesn't qualify quite as an Exclamation Mark as it's still a lesson in process. It's something that I wish I practiced better than I do, even though by nature I'm a quiet person--and that is, talking less. I rarely regret  the things I didn't say. On the other hand I've lost count of the times I've wished I could just press the "undo" button on words that have popped out of my mouth in the emotion of a moment. And at times that others come to talk to me, why is it that I think that I have to talk so much? Usually people already know the answers to their dilemmas. Talking it out helps them to realize that--if only the listener focuses on helping them think things through. A professional coach once told me that she had the letters W A I T on the wall of her office, strategically placed so that she'd see them behind the person she was meeting with. The letters stood for: W hy A ...

First, an addendum to my prologue: These "Exclamation Marks" are on my own hands and I'm sharing them just for fun, not because I think they are the final word in wisdom for everyone; They represent "aha" moments for me, or what has worked in my life.   They are also not written in any kind of orderly sequence or order of importance, which fits in with the first lesson I've learned, which is: Plan not to Plan   This is coming from someone, who as you will know, if you've spent any time with me at all; has spent way too much time planning. And trying to fit more things than are humanly possible into a given time frame. And who never gives up trying to be better organized.   I like being organized and I like thinking through what is most important to get on with, but that's not what I mean. I'm talking about those longer term plans. Goodness, even a week can go seriously awry, let alone five years.   In one of my journa...

After writing about my  Exclamation Marks  and saying that I would write about the life lessons they represent to me, I was suddenly struck with self doubt. "What was I thinking, that I thought I had 'life lessons' to share with anyone?" I thought. As I share the thoughts that did come to mind over the next little while, let me say that just because they are things I believe to be true or helpful, does not mean I practice them well, although I try! I won't write about my faith as one of my life lessons as that would diminish it somehow. The fact of faith is intrinsic to who I am. There are lessons that I could and have written about related to faith. They are different to the context of my Exclamation Marks--although any sound lesson can find its root and be confirmed in scripture--the pages of the Bible.  The underlying premise of my faith is this: God exists;  an active relationship with him is possible; he loves each and every human with a love th...

I remember many long ago conversations with my dear  Aunt Agnes  (I've written several times about her on this blog, and if you click on her name it will link to one of the stories.) She would often laugh at how old she "suddenly" found herself (she was 50 years older than me,) and yet how inside she felt just like the young girl she once had been. On her apartment wall hung a black and white photograph of a pretty young girl in a long skirt and starched white blouse, hair tied back in a large black bow. The twinkle in her eye had not changed a bit in the many decades since the photograph was taken. Now that I'm in my sixties I so relate. There are parts of my body that just aren't what they used to be, but my heart and spirit don't feel old. One day last fall I was driving somewhere when I noticed my hands on the steering wheel. I work my poor hands hard and they are usually sorely neglected in the manicure department, but it was the brown "age spots...