Jesus: please be, not just in my heart, but in my mind, my hands and my lips; even in the least obviously significant corners of my being. Baptise me; fill me, full of you Lord.
I need Christ; not me and my ways, wisdom, or effort. I need his love to flow from the pores of my skin, and through my tongue and fingertips.
The fruit of the Spirit is a natural result of him in me. I realize that I cannot afford to go one day without being before him and inviting him; begging him, to come and fill me up with his dear self.
I am tempted to use the word "suddenly" and say that I suddenly have so much more clarity on all of this, but of course it hasn't been sudden, but a persistent seeking to understand over time. I have been a slow learner!
Verses that previously puzzled or perplexed me and seemed impossible to live up to, now make sense. In fact, it is as exciting as seeing the world through a new pair of glasses. I can't live up to them, but he doesn't expect me to be able to. He only asks that I know him, and let him fully occupy the land of my life and then he will live them through me. For instance:
Matthew 5:48 (New International Version)
48Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect
Would he ask something of us that is as impossible as that sounds? If we read it as meaning that we have to do the work we are undone before we start.
John 5:39-40 (New International Version)
39You diligently study the Scriptures because you think that by them you possess eternal life. These are the Scriptures that testify about me, 40 yet you refuse to come to me to have life.
Watchman Nee writes in his book, The Normal Christian Life, p.181:
God will not give me humility or patience or holiness as separate gifts of his grace. He is not a retailer dispensing grace to us in packets, measuring out some patience to the impatient, some love to the unloving, some meekness to the proud, in quantities that we take and work on as a kind of capital. He has given only one gift to meet all our need: his Son Christ Jesus. As I look to him to live out his life in me, he will be humble and patient and loving and everything else I need in my stead.
1 John 5:11-12 (New International Version)
11And this is the testimony: God has given us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. 12He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life
This means that I am free from both credit and condemnation. Mainly I am free!
Come Lord Jesus--fill me with your love. Be love in me, be patience and gentleness, kindness and humility in me.